After having several dreams about giving myself the shot (in the wrong ways, of course. In one dream, I poked myself on one side and the medicine wouldn't go in, so I had to take it out and do it again and again and again) I waited in bed waiting for an acceptable time to get up and do it. Just to get it over with. (Its amazing how you can psychologically work yourself up so that you have dreams about your concerns.)
But, I'm proud to say, "its done!" Not bad, not bad at all. Really, the stinging from the medicine going in hurt worse (and I use the term "hurt" here loosely) than the stick. Thankfully, the medicine DID come out the first time, so no need to poke myself again. ;)
I'm also glad to inform you that E did not pass out during the process. I wanted someone around while I did it...just in case. I don't typically get queasy and pass out during that type of thing, but giving myself a shot really isn't typical for me, either. Of course, E didn't watch or anything, but he gave me commentary before I started, talking about making sure I didn't touch the needle first. (duh)
Anywho, we also went ahead and did our homework for today. Since I got up early, the kids were still in bed... The nurse informed me yesterday that we needed to "make a deposit" today and tomorrow, and then, in her words "after Saturday, its just for fun. Gotta keep the husband happy!" Hehe.
Well, off to ovulate!
Friday, January 9, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Needles
So, I've never really been a big fan of needles. I mean, who is, really? They're sharp, they pretty much always hurt, and they make you bleed.
I was reflecting yesterday (while I was at the dr. ) on how I used to be freaked out by getting my blood drawn. i didn't have to have it very often, but when I did I started freaking out when I got to the lab and signed in. Albeit, I've had some nasty experiences with blood draws (one lady kept bumping the needle while it was in my arm with her rather large tummy over and over again) but I still thought they were horrible.
I can't even tell now when they draw my blood. Maybe its different sized needles, or better nurses. But, I think that most of my pain was actually from the fear. I barely feel it. Of course, I've had lots and lots and LOTS of practice over the past year. I have thought about counting how many times I've done it the past year, but its a rather daunting task. I've had a lot of them.
Here's where the fear part comes in again. I have to do the trigger shot tomorrow. I thought, ignorantly, that they'd do the shot at the dr.'s office. Nope. They called today and explained over the phone how to do it. Ack! Now I'm FREAKING out! I know it isn't a big deal, that it probably wouldn't have even hurt at the dr. But, *I* have to do it to *myself* for the *first time*.
What if I do it wrong, what if I put it in the wrong place, the wrong time, get an air bubble in there? I'm not a professional!!! I don't know what I'm doing!
THAT'S why I'm scared of needles.
I was reflecting yesterday (while I was at the dr. ) on how I used to be freaked out by getting my blood drawn. i didn't have to have it very often, but when I did I started freaking out when I got to the lab and signed in. Albeit, I've had some nasty experiences with blood draws (one lady kept bumping the needle while it was in my arm with her rather large tummy over and over again) but I still thought they were horrible.
I can't even tell now when they draw my blood. Maybe its different sized needles, or better nurses. But, I think that most of my pain was actually from the fear. I barely feel it. Of course, I've had lots and lots and LOTS of practice over the past year. I have thought about counting how many times I've done it the past year, but its a rather daunting task. I've had a lot of them.
Here's where the fear part comes in again. I have to do the trigger shot tomorrow. I thought, ignorantly, that they'd do the shot at the dr.'s office. Nope. They called today and explained over the phone how to do it. Ack! Now I'm FREAKING out! I know it isn't a big deal, that it probably wouldn't have even hurt at the dr. But, *I* have to do it to *myself* for the *first time*.
What if I do it wrong, what if I put it in the wrong place, the wrong time, get an air bubble in there? I'm not a professional!!! I don't know what I'm doing!
THAT'S why I'm scared of needles.
Totally OT
What would you do if you or your husband lost his/your job? Keep going with every day activities? Cut back everything that isn't essential? Somewhere in between?
Someone I ran into yesterday is in this exact situation. Lost income. But, yet, children still in preschool 3 days a week, daughter in ballet, son in karate, gym membership, etc. I don't know their situation, which is why I didn't chat with them about it, but it got me thinking about what WE would do.
E and I have enough saved up to supplement us with his income for 8 months. But, I can guarantee that we would not be living the same way in those 8 mths (if we needed that long). Sorry, Olivia, but you'd be out of ballet...and both of you kiddos would be yanked out of preschool. I'd definitely be trying to pick up more hours at work. I think that we could definitely stretch those 8 mths into several more by cutting back on those things and others like eating out and movie rentals, etc. Maybe its E's personality rubbing onto me, maybe its our old financial peace class giving me perspective, I'm not sure.
Anyway, it just gave me something to think about last night... Unfortunately, it COULD happen to any of us. Its happening all of the time lately.
Someone I ran into yesterday is in this exact situation. Lost income. But, yet, children still in preschool 3 days a week, daughter in ballet, son in karate, gym membership, etc. I don't know their situation, which is why I didn't chat with them about it, but it got me thinking about what WE would do.
E and I have enough saved up to supplement us with his income for 8 months. But, I can guarantee that we would not be living the same way in those 8 mths (if we needed that long). Sorry, Olivia, but you'd be out of ballet...and both of you kiddos would be yanked out of preschool. I'd definitely be trying to pick up more hours at work. I think that we could definitely stretch those 8 mths into several more by cutting back on those things and others like eating out and movie rentals, etc. Maybe its E's personality rubbing onto me, maybe its our old financial peace class giving me perspective, I'm not sure.
Anyway, it just gave me something to think about last night... Unfortunately, it COULD happen to any of us. Its happening all of the time lately.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Holy smokers!
I had 6 follicles today. 6! 4 on my right side and 2 on my left. However, the nurse said that I would probably only ovulate 3 of them (which were all on the right). One was 18mm, one was 17 mm and one that was 16 or 15, (I can't remember). The remaining one on the right and the two on my left were under 10mm- so not developed enough to ovulate.
Expecting a call today about what to do- which day the dr. thinks I'll ovulate, if I should use OPK's this cycle, etc.
Expecting a call today about what to do- which day the dr. thinks I'll ovulate, if I should use OPK's this cycle, etc.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Wine=Good loving
Lets just say, I'm hoping to start this month's trying with a little finesse. I'm sick of just "getting it over with", even though sometimes that's what I really want. I want it to be fun, enjoyable- the way its suppose to be.
To get me in good spirits I'm doing a few things today. I first finished reading Breaking Dawn...again. The last two pages of that book get me teary-eyed every time. I just love Edward and Bella (well, mostly I wish I could BE Bella. lol) I also watched the trailer to Twilight. *swoon*
Secondly, I'll be enjoying a nice big glass of wine. Ahhhhh..... Maybe a bubble bath, too. Wait. no. that's my recipe for sleep. My friends tell me I need to drink past the sleepiness to get to the fun part. (Good advice from good friends, *cough* Devan. *cough*) Well, past the point of sleepiness anyway. I seem to be more, um...ahem, willing with a few glasses in me.
Thirdly, I'll be trying extra hard to enjoy myself. I'm not going to feel sorry for myself. I'm going to pretend that we aren't "doing our homework" and that we don't have just a job to do.
Lastly, did I mention the wine? lol
To get me in good spirits I'm doing a few things today. I first finished reading Breaking Dawn...again. The last two pages of that book get me teary-eyed every time. I just love Edward and Bella (well, mostly I wish I could BE Bella. lol) I also watched the trailer to Twilight. *swoon*
Secondly, I'll be enjoying a nice big glass of wine. Ahhhhh..... Maybe a bubble bath, too. Wait. no. that's my recipe for sleep. My friends tell me I need to drink past the sleepiness to get to the fun part. (Good advice from good friends, *cough* Devan. *cough*) Well, past the point of sleepiness anyway. I seem to be more, um...ahem, willing with a few glasses in me.
Thirdly, I'll be trying extra hard to enjoy myself. I'm not going to feel sorry for myself. I'm going to pretend that we aren't "doing our homework" and that we don't have just a job to do.
Lastly, did I mention the wine? lol
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Say "no" to drugs!
Yay! My last dose of clomid was last night. I'm so glad to be done with it for this month. I was relieved that my symptoms were not the same as last month (I really was VERY mean, irritable, and emotional) but it came with other symptoms that were much worse.
The dizziness actually took me by surprise. I didn't really encounter that last month. I realize that it says "may cause dizziness" right on the prescription bottle, but I thought it was just a thing that might happen. I didn't think it effected me like that because I didn't notice it last month.
I was so dizzy every night after taking it, that I got sick to my tummy. Then, couldn't sleep. When I finally did fall asleep, I'd have night sweats. Hot flashes SUCK! Menopause should be a gas!
So, no more meds, no more sweats! No more awful dizz-i-ness!
The dizziness actually took me by surprise. I didn't really encounter that last month. I realize that it says "may cause dizziness" right on the prescription bottle, but I thought it was just a thing that might happen. I didn't think it effected me like that because I didn't notice it last month.
I was so dizzy every night after taking it, that I got sick to my tummy. Then, couldn't sleep. When I finally did fall asleep, I'd have night sweats. Hot flashes SUCK! Menopause should be a gas!
So, no more meds, no more sweats! No more awful dizz-i-ness!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
A new year!
100 mg of Clomid isn't being too horrible, yet. I woke up with a headache yesterday, but nothing serious. Hot flashes are pretty bad, but do-able. Mood-swings- well, you'd have to ask Eric about that. :)
Here's to hoping for a great new year, full of pregnancy and baby. :)
We went to a dear friend's house last night for New Year's Eve. We had a wonderful time! (Well, I'm not entirely sure about Eric- I didn't ask, but I did.) The kids did whatever the heck they wanted, (Devan- I hope that we didn't leave your house too messy and broken. I feel horrible about the Styrofoam being all over the place.) while the dad's watched football and the mommys drank some wine. That wine was much needed, let me tell you. I left blissfully happy, and it felt good.
Thanks for a wonderful night, Devan!
Here's to hoping for a great new year, full of pregnancy and baby. :)
________________________________________________
We went to a dear friend's house last night for New Year's Eve. We had a wonderful time! (Well, I'm not entirely sure about Eric- I didn't ask, but I did.) The kids did whatever the heck they wanted, (Devan- I hope that we didn't leave your house too messy and broken. I feel horrible about the Styrofoam being all over the place.) while the dad's watched football and the mommys drank some wine. That wine was much needed, let me tell you. I left blissfully happy, and it felt good.
Thanks for a wonderful night, Devan!
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