Tuesday, October 6, 2009

If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Today I had an interesting discussion with some other moms about the popular "country" fridge magnet, sign, or mother's day quote "if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy". (Don't get me started on how much I hate it when people say "ain't"...)

Our discussion centered around the idea that we, as mothers, set the tone in our house. Unfortunately, that means if we're tired, grumpy, irritable, impatient, etc our children are likely to mimic the same attitude. I can tell you that our household the last few days has not been one comprised of happy, content, and pleasant people. In fact, we've had lots of fits, lots of screaming, and lots of whining.

During the discussion today, I took a second to really think about the last few days/week. I realised that *I* really haven't been happy, content, or pleasant. Sure, my kids have been a bit under the weather, as have I, but I'm starting to think that if I had a better attitude than maybe the kids would, too. This may not always be the key, but what if it could curb some of the tantrums and power struggles?

Of course, I'm not sitting around throwing fits about wearing tennis shoes instead of flip flops (but, as an adult I get to make my own decision there) and I'm not throwing my food on the floor because I don't want chicken noodle soup. But, I am bursting into tears and yelling when my 3 year old decides to poop on his closet floor or deliberately pee on the tile instead of the toilet (his bum was TOUCHING THE TOILET! totally NOT an accident...) I am yelling at them to stop the yelling. I am more impatient with them. I am, getting irritated at the kids for, well, being kids and running around like crazy people all. day. long.

How do I change the tone in my house? How do I find more patience. Prayer, of course. But, what else? Biting my tongue? Trying to take a breather before I discipline or try to "teach"? Or, maybe just simply trying to have a better attitude about things I'm thinking about?

Whatever the way is, I AM trying to be a happy momma!


d e v a n said...

If you figure it out, let me know. My attitude can definitely affect the rest of the house. Sometimes I just fake it.

Jen said...

I had a teenage girlfrom church come to the house to play with the girls for awhile last year. She was here for 2 hours, I paid her 10 dollars. It ended my day at 330 instead of 530 (when nathan gets home). Some days I would sleep, others I would make dinner or clean in peace, once or twice I took a long hot bubble bath and read a book (yes, the whole two hours). Most days she took them outside to play so there was peace in the house.

Even if you couldn't do it everyday, is there anyone who can give you a break a few times a week? You nned to rest mama!