I love Thailand like a love song, baby

Ever since we came back from Thailand, I've been missing it.  Like, in a super strong, unexplained way.

I'm not a global world trotter, so at first I thought it was normal.  Go on an amazing vacation, dream about it for weeks/months after.  Seems normal.

Except, it turns out, it isn't.  The more people I talked to that went on trips to amazing places had a great time, wished they could go back, but not in the same miss-it-so-much-i-might-cry way I do.

I started to wonder why it was different for me.  What is it about me or about Thailand that has grasped me in such a way that the country is never far from my thoughts?

A few months ago, I had this tiny feeling that maybe a missions trip might be in order.  Maybe that's what my heart is feeling.  A tug to serve?  Shortly after I put a prayer request in ink in my mother's bible study at our old church (I still go for bible study.  I love those ladies and couldn't leave all together.)  Two weeks after that, our church had two back-to-back messages on missions.  On how our pastor felt like it was a vision to send one family for short term missions (3 months to a year) from each missional community (small group) completely funded BY our missional community in the next 2-4 years.  The entire service, I was thinking- that may be us.  It could be us.  I want it to be us.

I wrote down my gut feelings in my prayer journal, and continued to pray about it.  Then, a few days later, a lovely friend in our small group tugged me aside and said, "when I was listening to the message on Sunday, I felt like our group would send you.  I've never seen someone so moved by a vacation to a country like you."

But... how?  When?  HOW?

My husband is feeling zero calling to do this right now.  ME?  I could go tomorrow (isn't that the way it always works?? )  I have no idea on logistics of any of this.  Now is really not the best time to go to Thailand, but that doesn't mean we won't.  It also doesn't mean that it isn't 5 years from now.  Or, maybe, this preparation of my heart is strictly to lead me to something else.  Maybe it isn't even to go to Thailand or another country, but to soften my heart to missions in general?

It reminds me of a friend who was quickly building an addition to their house so they can foster larger sibling groups.  They thought they were preparing for a specific sibling set that needed to be placed quickly.  So, they got it done!  They didn't end up getting the siblings they thought they would, but instead got a sweet little girl that desperately needs their home as a safe place.  Their preparation was not for what they thought, but the preparation was not in vain.

Maybe this is my addition.  Maybe its just a tugging on my heart to get me to lean my ear in, to listen more carefully to God's heart for his children.  But, honestly, part of me hopes it involves Thailand.

Oonlee Bungalows

I'm fairly certain we could not have picked a better place to stay for the island portion of our trip to Thailand.  We found Oonlee Bungalows (on Koh Jum) on Trip Advisor and fell in love.  Once we got there, however, we REALLY fell in love.  It was amazing.  Beautiful, quiet, private, intimate.  The owners were so friendly, and had our first names down the day we arrived.  

You may think this post is picture overload, but I'm of the thought that there is no such thing when it comes to beautiful images. :)

The water front during low tide.

When you come to the resort, you take a ferry from the mainland, and then take a long tail boat from the fairy to the bungalow.  It was a crazy system. 

This is what you see when you come in. 

 The stonework was beautiful. 

 The stairs were a little hard on my knees, but it certainly got our excersise in daily. 

 This is the restaurant.  The food here was ah-maz-ing.  I didn't have anything I didn't like.  Most things were the best I've ever had.  

 Even the coffee was divine. 

Every morning we'd go to breakfast, linger over coffee, and read a book.  I can't tell you the last time I did that before this trip.  Maybe our honey moon? 

  Who doesn't want to see this amazing sunset view over phi phi every evening?  

 The bungalows were small, but perfect for our needs.  A bed, a bathroom, a balcony.  Who needs more when you're living on an island?

 View from our bed.

Jungle view from our room

Ocean view from our room

 Dear Hammock, 

I love you.

Please have me back soon.

 To be honest, I was slightly nervous about the whole "no hot water thing".  But, it wasn't a big deal.  The water wasn't "cold".  It was hanging out in a basin outside in the heat.  We also took showers after a hot day at the beach, so the cooler water felt wonderful. 

 On valentine's day, they gave me a rose.  Sweet, huh? 

 Eric and I had a wonderful time getting to know the owners.  Valerie was an amazing hostess.  We can't wait to go back.

The time I ran a half marathon

So, I ran a half marathon November 9th.  It was sort of a big deal for me.  I mean, I basically flunked out passed out off the track  in high school during a sprint.  I had to quit track because I couldn't run farther than a mile.  This was 13.1 miles, guys.  Seriously.  Thirteen point freaking one miles.

  I hurt my knee a few weeks before the half, so I was forced to take some time off after by my physical therapist and doctor (and, really, my knees.  They hate me.)  What was a month of PT and time off running has now, as of tomorrow, turned into two, and, unfortunately, is extended into the unforeseeable future.  (For those who are interested, I go back to the doctor tomorrow.  Two months of PT fixed one knee, but not the other.)

I didn't post about my half before because I was pouting.  For two months.  I stewed, pretty pissed off that I can't run.  Embarrassed, I guess, that I was posting about my half marathon as a "runner" but was unable to run.  I felt like a fraud.  (Also, spending two months working through my identity in Christ as his daughter, and not as a "runner" or some one who worked really hard at something and achieves a goal.  Tough stuff.)

But, I guess I've come to the conclusion that I DID run a half marathon (ground breaking conclusion, no?)  no matter what I'm doing now.  So, I guess I'll share. 

My friend's husband graciously picked up our packets for us and sent me a picture of my number the day before our race. 

It was a cold morning.  We had mittens, hats, coats, pants.  I almost didn't want to take off my pants for the start, but knew I'd be hot after a few miles.  (I think I gave my coat to E around mile 7.)  

My friends and I started towards the back.  I was anticipating a rather slow finish: me with my knees, my friend T who was 11 weeks postpartum, and a friend who's longest run had been 8 miles.  My goal was to finish and to have fun.

The first few miles, I entertained a few of our group by telling them about a horrendous birth I had just attended.  It was the week prior and the indignities, disrespect, and abuse were fresh on my mind.  I ranted for a good 2-3 miles.  

Mile 3 my knee is starting to stab, so I yank off the tape the PT had put on the night before at a late night appointment (6pm.  she was good to me.) 

Mile 5, and  I'm still hanging with my homies, (there's my friend T who ran the 10k with me)  Still feeling pretty good, though I remember my knee starting to hurt pretty bad. 

After mile 6 or so, my "bad" knee went completely numb.  It was seriously amazing.  When I was running, I felt little to no pain.  Every time I stopped to walk, it was painful.  

Miles 6,7,8, were pretty- most of that time spent on a greenway.  E and the kids stopped and visited, too.

Mile10- My running buddies and I had planned to do walk/run (when I trained I walked after every mile for about a minute), but I ended up breaking off  because it hurt too much to walk. 

Mile 11, I remember thinking/praying that I was actually going to do this thing.  I had 2.1 miles to go.  I was going to finish!

Mile 12, my other knee started to hurt some, but my bad knee was still numb.  I cried from the relief that I was going to finish.

Mile 13, there was a lady in front of me that had been there a while, but was slowing down.  I saw my training girls at the finish line, telling me to kick it into gear and pass her.  So, I sprint it in for the finish.  

I'm in the yellow shirt.  My chip time was something like 2:38:07

Some of my running friends.

My friend T and I. 

I did most of my training with this girl.  She's amazing!  She was such a wonderful partner.  I miss running with her like crazy!

My friend's husband captured this gem right before the finish line.  This is what I actually felt like the last .1.  

There you have it.  My half marathon.  Since it may be my only half marathon I ever run, I'm glad I was able to do it with my friends and not kill myself for a certain "time".

providential good fortune

I went to a small Christian school for my high school years.  We had this really neat guy for our bible teacher.  He was very thought provoking, to the point where it was sometimes frustrating. (at the time, though, I always thought he was argumentative.  Now, I see he was trying to get us to explore our own belief system and not the belief system of our parents.)

Anyway, one of his big beefs was with the word "luck" and how often we use it.  He preferred  instead, to use the term "providential good fortune!"  Meaning the care of God in your life, resulting in something good. 

At the time, I sort of thought it was silly.   All caught up in semantics.  If what I intend doesn't change with the words I use, what difference does it make? 

This past week, I some how stumbled upon a website called doula match.  Its a website that matches up local doulas with clients.  Its free, though they ask for donations.  I usually am pretty skeptical of things like that.  But this time I thought "meh.  why not?  I doubt I'll get any calls from this, but I'll put it out there."

I had my information on for all of two days before I got my first response.  An email from some one looking for a doula for her hopeful VBAC in June (um, score!  This is totally one of my passions!) With in a few days, I also received a phone call from another woman interested in my services, who was referred to me by Glenni, who runs A Nurturing Moment (a baby/maternity boutique here in town.) and the blog where I posted on MSPI.   The same day, I was contacted by another woman who found me on Doula Match.

This weekend I met with two of the three women, and I felt like we really hit it off.  I'm hoping they thought so, too, and I can get this doula train a going. ;)

 I can see the hand of God guiding me where he wants me to be.  I don't know if I'll be a doula for years and years, but, right now, I am certain this is what I'm supposed to do now.  Its a pretty freeing feeling.  I'd say I was feeling lucky, but I am really feeling providential good fortune. 

A year

Its amazing how quickly a year can go by.  (It always seems so much faster when the kids are really little.  Maybe because they change so much in a year?)

 

 

From this:

 

 

To this:

 

Inside, night time pictures are never good.  I'm glad I got a few earlier in the day.

Guys, this girl.  She melts me heart.

Eliza's VCUG

Thanks for all of the prayers and well wishes.  It went so well!  Not only did she do great (she was the life of the radiology department that day) she didn't show any signs of kidney reflux!

Here she is in her hospital gown.

She didn't even cry when they inserted the catheter!  Amazing little girl!  (It was sort of funny because she DID cry during her renal u/s at the urologist's office.  Which, clearly, didn't hurt.  She was just plain mad.)

We still have to watch out for unexplained high fevers, but we're sort of professionals at fever watch. :)