until my ultrasound.
Not that I'm counting or anything. No, that would be a little too obsessive. To sit, look at the clock, and calculate in my head how many hours I have to go until I can get an early peak at my baby.
Nope, I wasn't thinking that.
But, I'll tell you what I was thinking. I was thinking that this is the most pregnant I've been since Austin's pregnancy. Two other times I made it this far. Two other times I made it to the first ultrasound. Two other times I brought home a baby from those pregnancies.
Sure, I know its still early. Sure, I know that something could still happen. Sure, I'm still nervous, and panicky, and neurotic about pee sticks and temperatures. But, for me, for MY body, this is a miracle!
So miraculous that I actually pulled down some maternity clothes from the attic. I sorted through some and put some of the smaller stuff in the wash (yes, I'm already struggling in my clothes. Yes, I realize that its not the baby, yet. Yes, its just bloating.) I haven't been that hopeful since...well, my loss in July of 07.
Wow. Its a miracle.